No Script

I was having one of those awful dreams this morning before I woke up. You know the one I mean - you have a test and you haven't studied or you're frantic because you can't find the classroom. In my case, I was in a play and I couldn't remember my lines before I was supposed to go on, had no idea what the play was about and didn't know where I was supposed to stand once I got out on the stage. I was really annoyed that the Director/Producer hadn't placed tape on the marks or provided scripts in the wings.

Was I ever happy to find out that it wasn't real.

The more I've thought about it though, the more I've realized how very real the situation really is. Life is unpredictable and we can't memorize the lines, determine the outcome or always place ourselves in the right spot. The Director of our lives doesn't usually give us a neat script with directions and dialogue clearly laid out. All we can do is pray that we will recognize the leading of the Holy Spirit and be open to God's direction.

To recognize God's leading - there's the rub.  I believe that God is always transmitting; whether or not I am on the right frequency or have the volume turned up loud enough is the real issue. I found this particularly true throughout the Christmas holidays. We were very busy - and it was all good. We even kept the focus on the "reason for the season," but I didn't feel the presence of God very keenly. I didn't post because I didn't feel as if I had anything to say. God was there, but we weren't connecting much.

What was missing over the holidays was silence and regular quiet times. I think a lot while I'm driving - most of the time over Christmas, the car was full of people. I take time most days with scripture - there was little time during the last couple of weeks to do so. I try usually to connect with God while I go about my business during the day, but I got distracted while celebrating and visiting.

This full life is what most of us experience day after day. At this stage of my life, I have more free time than I used to and so I had forgotten the necessity of deliberately setting aside the time instead of waiting until the moment seems right. I had not made the quiet time a priority, but it was something that I was fitting in. In a busy life, fitting in usually means leaving out. However, I've found that regular conversations with God establish a familiarity that gets a little rusty when they are hastily arranged and not a priority. God is there, but the comfort of God's presence and the sense of God's leading is not as strong.

At one point, Jesus said to the apostles, "Come apart...and rest awhile...". It's still good advice. Otherwise, it is a little more difficult to star in our own theatre of life and trust that the Director knows what He's doing.